An unlucky for some snapshot.

 There’s another man in the shadows, he’s spent so long looking down or away he doesn’t know if life really is all shadows or if it’s just because he’s never looked at the light.

He’s spent so long trying to avoid other people’s scrutiny that he’s not sure if he can hold up his head. He’s been taught that all those looks are full of; judgement, disappointment and disapproval.

He doesn’t know if the shadows are really there or it’s just because he’s always looking down. No-one taught him how to look up let alone how to look someone else in the eye.

Even if he does fleetingly glance up he’ll look back down again before he sees the disappointment or disapproval in your eyes. Sometimes the fear of those things is enough to keep his head bowed.

Even in a crowd he is lonely because he doesn’t see those around him and believes that they don’t see him either.

There are times he hopes someone will see him and wonder what ails him, there are times he hopes the light of someone’s regard will shine in his direction and frighten away the shadows.

These times are few and far between because he he’s not sure he’s seen and at times if he even exists outside the shadow bound existence that he is trapped in.

Secretly, even from himself, he hopes, he hopes that one day someone will not just see him but will see him and tell him that he is good, he is worthy and he is ‘alright’.

Those words maybe even lighting a flame that lights up his existence and banishes the shadows.

However, for the moment, there’s another man in the shadows…

Sh

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It’s shit

Its shit being lost again.

Its shit looking at a map

And not knowing where you are

Or how you got there.

It’s shit sinking again.

It’s shit floating in an ocean

And not knowing which way to swim

Or how far.

It’s shit drinking poison again

It’s shit not slaking your thirst

And not knowing if you’ll get unwell

Or how sick.

It’s shit losing hope again

It’s shit not having faith

Or risking to dream.

It’s shit wanting to die again.

It’s shit not daring to live.

Or gambling on life.

Sh

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